A Scary Night

August 22nd, 2009

Exactly 44 days after learning we were having girls and being diagnosed with Twin to Twin Transfusion Syndrome.
32 days after undergoing laser ablation surgery to "cure" TTTS.
16 days after administering a blood transfusion to Leila for TAPS.
11 days after learning our sweet Leila Marie had grown wings and joined all the angels in heaven.
Saturday night. Dave and I laid in bed watching The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. I was also practicing knitting - my new favorite bedrest activity. At about 10:30 and toward the end of the movie I felt something trickle and thought I'd wet myself. I threw back the covers telling Dave, "I need to go to the restroom." What I saw under the covers terrified me. My gray shorts were soaked and I sat in a wet spot larger than my bottom. Part of the white comforter was between my legs and was soaked a large reddish pink spot.

I can pretty confidently say that I've never experienced hysteria in my life - that is before this moment. I cried to Dave, "Babe" but it came out more like a plea. I could barely breathe. I was panting like a dog to try and control myself. Dave told me to stay still and jumped up to call an ambulance. I remember listening to him talking in the other room as I fumbled for my phone to call my doctor. I called the after hours number and was told that they no longer use that after hours service. Seriously!?! I tried the number they gave me and listened to hold music for what seemed like an eternity. Dave came in and told me to call my friend, Angela, to see if she could watch Solana while he started trying numbers. (We never did get through to my doctor.) By this time I was crying uncontrollably. Angela's husband, Jas (who I've never met), answered and I somehow conveyed to him that I was going to the hospital and asked if Angela could come over. He said "yes" but I'm not sure he could actually understand what I said because Angela called back a minute later. I have no idea what I said to her but she showed up about 5 minutes later - at the same time as the ambulance. I remember waving to her lamely as they rolled me out of the house.

My first ambulance ride. They let Dave ride with me. He should have followed us but I didn't want him to leave me. They put on the sirens because of the huge amount of fluid and blood I was losing. The EMT then proceeded to give me an IV in a moving vehicle - ironically, the best IV I've ever received! Suddenly, I felt like I needed to poop. I mentioned this and his eyes bulged and told me not to push. Good thing I had Dave's hand to squeeze because that was my saving grace.

The hospital. We arrived at the hospital and the emergency was suddenly over. Everyone was so calm. I remember thinking, "WTF?!?!?" Why isn't anyone running around and freaking out? Do you people realize that I'm 24 weeks pregnant and my water broke?! Will someone please look at this faucet between my legs and do something about it? The nurse was calmly placing monitors on my belly for the baby's heartbeat and contractions. She was also tightening the belts to hold them in place and I could feel the fluid gush out as she did so. I looked at Dave like, "What the hell is she doing?" She saw my eyes and told me to calm down - the fluid would come out as it pleased and she wasn't doing anything to hurt the baby. I looked down at what used to be a taut round belly and saw a lumpy sunken-in belly. Has anyone called my doctor? Finally, a doctor arrived to do an ultrasound. He hoped that it was just Leila's sac that ruptured. We were doubtful, though, based on the amount of fluid I'd lost. Leila didn't have much fluid. Chloe did. I could see Dave's face as he watched the monitor. He shook his head and I knew it was Chloe. My throat tightened. Dave called my parents and Leticia to let them know what was going on. It was some time around midnight and my mother decided to fly in the next day.

Hope. The doctor gave us hope, though. He determined that my cervix was not dilated and, therefore, I was not in real labor. The tiny contractions I was experiencing were probably just my body reacting to the ruptured membranes. They often have mothers spend several weeks in the hospital after their waters break. They spoke to my doctor and would put me on magnesium to stop the contractions, antibiotics to prevent infection, and fluids to make me feel better. Fortunately, I'd already received the steroid shots to hasten Chloe's lung development. They moved me into my own room and started the drugs. It was about 3am now and they said the magnesium would make me feel pretty crappy so I wanted to go to sleep right away. Everything seemed to be under control so Dave called a cab and went home.